How to Increase Your Discipline

One day, I stepped on the scale and was thrilled to see that I had lost 6 pounds. Exactly one month later, I had not only gained those 6 pounds back, but an additional 6 pounds. The reason why I went from being down 6 pounds to gaining 12 has everything to do with DISCIPLINE.

When I started my weight loss journey, I was well aware it started with a mindset change just like all transformations do. I had to actively decide that I desired reaching my goal more than I desired the comfort and stagnation of being the same. This doesn’t just apply to weight loss, though. I had to go through similar decision-making when it came to getting my Master’s Degree, moving to a different state, and starting a nonprofit organization.

Discipline is often prayed for or blamed as the reason behind goals falling to the wayside, when in reality, the problem starts with your mindset. Discipline is tied to doing, whereas mindset is tied to thinking. Here are a couple of ways to shift your mindset to increase your discipline:

1) Daily Affirmations

By creating mantras or affirmations that are directly tied to to goal you are reaching, you will be able to reinforce the belief that they are true. I change out my affirmations each month because it gives me enough time to truly believe in the words I am saying, in addition to fine-tuning the affirmations for my current situation. For example, I am in a season where I can focus on investing in myself and my businesses, so my June affirmations are:

2) Journaling/Habit Tracking

Before you start making the change, notate the thoughts, feelings, and habits you currently possess. By keeping track of these, you will be able to better understand your pitfalls and roadblocks. If you are having similar negative thoughts each day about your body, they may be showing up in your wardrobe. You are likely wearing comfortable, baggy clothes to hide your body, not realizing you are reinforcing those thoughts. Once you recognize these patterns, begin to create a plan to combat them. This shows up for me with exercise. I would ruminate over not liking how my clothes fit, but despised the thought of driving to the gym after a long day of work, working out when it’s crowded, and I didn’t enjoy at-home body weight workouts. To combat my pattern of not working out because of those roadblocks, I found a way to make my desire to exercise work for me. Instead of going to the gym at 6 pm when everyone is there, I go early in the morning as a way to jumpstart my day. Starting my day at the gym removes all the barriers I originally created with my thoughts. Now I can replace the negative patterns with a schedule that makes me want to go to the gym!

3) Replace Excuses with Execution

Discipline is made more difficult when excuses are introduced. Combat those excuses with execution, whether that shows up as executing the action or executing a reframe for that excuse. This tip alone will close the gap between Gratitude and Delusion. When your thoughts say you can’t make money with that idea, reframe that into executing the idea and letting the profit speak for itself. Or, when you begin to think that rain is a sign not to go for a walk, consider that the rain may be encouraging you to cleanse yourself of negativity and reconnect with your true, grounded nature.

Remember: your thoughts become your beliefs, and those beliefs become your actions. Everything starts with your mind. When you’re ready to clarify which thoughts truly serve you, check out the Chaos to Clarity Guided Journal.

3 Habit-Building Strategies That Actually Work

If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably read a dozen blogs and books on habits, including how to build, break, or make them stick. But if we’re being real… knowing isn’t the same as doing. Life gets busy, and even with the best intentions, we can fall into cycles of chaos that pull us away from who we’re becoming.

Here are 3 simple yet powerful strategies that help you build habits that support your growth, not just in theory, but in your real, multifaceted life.

1) Habit Stacking: Attach new habits to something you’re already doing.

Instead of starting from scratch, build from your current rhythm. If you’re already brushing your teeth in the morning, use that time to say affirmations. If you journal with your coffee, add a five-minute gratitude practice to the end. Stack the new on top of the familiar—it creates less resistance and makes it easier for the habit to become automatic.

Try this: “After I pour my morning coffee, I will write down 3 things I’m grateful for.”

2) Reduce or Add Friction: Make it easy to do the good habits, and harder to fall into the not-so-good ones.

Want to drink more water? Keep your water bottle in plain sight. Want to scroll less? Move your social apps off your home screen (or delete them during your focused hours). We tend to think we lack discipline—but really, we just need better systems.

Ask yourself: How can I make the habit I want easier to start? And how can I make the habits I want to break a little harder to access?

3) Create Specific Cues: Anchor your habit to a time, place, or event.

Vague goals like “I’ll start meditating” don’t work because your brain needs a trigger. Try “I’ll meditate for five minutes right after I drop the kids off” or “I’ll take a walk every day at 6 p.m.” Time, location, or a daily event can become the mental cue that prompts your new habit.

Choose a trigger: Is it after a meal? When you sit at your desk? Before you check emails?

The truth is: building habits isn’t about becoming someone else—it’s about aligning your routines with the version of you that already exists within. The woman you’re becoming already has the clarity, discipline, and power you need. You just need to create an environment that makes it easier for her to show up.

Ready to move from chaos to clarity in your daily life?

Join the next Clarity Challenge to uncover which habits will actually move the needle for you. Let’s build rhythms that honor your multifaceted life, not restrict it.

Sign up for the next Clarity Challenge!

You’ve got this. One habit at a time.

3 Signs You're Operating in Chaos

Let’s be honest: chaos isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s silent. It creeps in slowly, tucked behind our color-coded calendars, endless to-do lists, and forgotten water bottles. One moment, we’re “just busy” and the next, we’re stuck in cycles that drain our energy, stifle our creativity, and cloud our vision.

If you’ve been feeling a little off lately, it might not just be a rough week. You might be operating in chaos. Here are three signs it’s time to pause, reset, and realign:

1. Constantly Overwhelmed

You’re always doing something, but somehow, nothing feels done. When I don’t have clarity around my offers or services, I find myself buried in busywork instead of meaningful progress. Maybe you’ve been there too — endlessly revamping your website, gathering more information for tasks you already know how to do, or obsessively color-coding your calendar instead of making actual moves. It’s not that you’re lazy, it’s that your energy is scattered. Without clarity, chaos becomes the default.

2. Neglecting Self-Care

Let’s call it what it is: when life feels chaotic, self-care often becomes an afterthought. When I’m deep in chaos, I forget to eat, drink water, or even do basic things like laundry. It’s like my body gets left behind while my mind runs on fumes. The build-up is real. Cluttered spaces lead to cluttered minds, and cluttered minds create even more chaotic lives. It’s a cycle that can feel hard to break until you consciously choose to reset and put yourself back on the priority list.

3. A Lack of Creativity

For me, clarity and creativity are best friends. One of my greatest passions is writing and performing poetry. When I’m clear and aligned, the words pour out of me with ease. But when I’m in chaos, it feels like my pen dries up. Every metaphor feels forced. Every idea feels muddy. When your creativity is stifled, it’s a sign that your spirit needs breathing room. Chaos suffocates inspiration, but clarity gives it wings.

Here’s the good news: Chaos isn’t permanent. You have the power to clear the clutter, reconnect with yourself, and move forward with purpose and peace.

Ready to step out of chaos and into clarity? Get Your Clarity Journal today and let’s design the life you were made for.

Balancing Priorities

Hey Besties,

When it comes to being Multifaceted, balancing your priorities becomes mandatory! Balancing work, life, and purpose starts with energy management in my life. We only have 24 hours a day, but the level of energy we have fluctuates and directly affects how much work we can get done. Here are three tips for you to improve your prioritization skills.

1. Replace Time Management with Energy Management - Approaching time management from an energy standpoint allows you to increase your discernment with prioritization. Rather than booking meetings during the time your body needs fuel, consider blocking off a standing lunchtime. On the days when you have a lot of meetings, schedule fewer admin tasks to be accomplished that day so you can have a mental break.

2. Orbit vs Order - My second tip for balancing is recognizing that your priorities orbit rather than having an order. Some days your family may require more for you and the next day you might require more for yourself and that is PERFECTLY FINE! Order limits you to catering to one priority more than others, whereas orbits allow the energy given to flow based on circumstance.

3. Weekly Tasks vs Daily Tasks - After making a new to-do list each day for a couple of years, I found that it caused more stress than satisfaction. Now, I create a list for the week of the main tasks I need to get accomplished. Giving myself a week instead of one day allowed me to feel less pressure and gave me the freedom to adjust my days based on my life.

No two days will look the same as a Multifaceted person, so give yourself grace as you manage your energy, allow your priorities to orbit, and approach tasks weekly rather than on a daily basis.

Ready for Clarity?

Feeling stuck or overwhelmed? Eternity is a transformation coach that helps you cut through the noise, align with your purpose, and create a strategic action plan so you can move forward with confidence and ease. These sessions enable you to transform your life by moving from chaos to clarity! Start Your Clarity Journey!

From Discouraged Writer to Confident Speaker

As I start my week, I begin to think about when I was in 5th grade. My teacher was very quirky and had us doing fun projects like writing an 80s/90s-themed song with graffiti cover art, short stories about any and everything, or listening to songs like "The Breaks" by Kurtis Blow.

We would write papers very often and I was always discouraged because she would say "Eternity, this paper is great. I just have a few suggestions". Next thing I knew my paper turned into a bloody massacre from all the red markings she had made. From that point on, I was convinced that I was a bad writer.

Until one day, someone introduced me to poetry and convinced me to start writing again. That writing turned into performing, which has now turned into being a public speaker. What once broke my spirit and kept me from being confident in my writing abilities, became the reason I am a critical thinker and creative writer. This is a mild example of ACEs. ACEs are any Adverse Childhood experiences that occur under the age of 18 that affect who you are as an adult. Other examples include bullying, violence, neglect, mental health issues, etc.  I have the honor to participate in an ACEs Awareness International Conference April 25 - 27. Who knew something so little could have affected me so much?

If you are interested in joining me at the conference, secure your tickets here. Otherwise, I encourage you to learn more about ACEs and reflect on how they could affect you as an adult.

Here’s to clarity and connection,

Eternity Sledge

Multifaceted Black Girl

The Defining Decade Book Review

Before I stepped into my 20s, I did a lot of research on what I should know and what I should be doing to make the most out of this monumentally shaping decade. One part of my research was reading The Defining Decade: Why your twenties matter– and how to make the most of them now by Meg Jay. The Defining Decade is split into three parts: Work, Love, and The Brain and The Body. Each section is broken down into different lessons that are accompanied by real-life stories. For some reason, I believed that when I finished this book I would be ready to conquer my twenties.

In the first section, Work, I learned about the importance of identity capital, weak ties, and customizing your own life. Jay defines identity capital as “our collection of personal assets”. It encompasses aspects of both work and personal life including how we speak and what goes on our resume. Understanding our identity capital is key to being aware of “what we bring to the adult marketplace”. It can be the difference between working at a local coffee shop and working at Google.

Weak ties can also make a difference in your career. We all know that life is about who you know not what you know and that's when weak ties come into play. Acquaintances who you barely know are more likely to have connections with people you have never come across and to have opinions differing from yours. These are the connections that help with interconnectedness and growth.

Taking advantage of the weak ties is one step toward customizing your life to be what you dreamed of. From a young age, we are taught that we can do anything we put our minds to. Although this is true to a certain extent it can be daunting. We all start with a pretty standard outline for life. As we learn and experience, we are able to customize our paths and differentiate our lives from the next person.

In the next section, Love, the main topics that stood out to me was the cohabitation effect and dating down. With the cohabitation effect, Jay said that the concept of living together being a good test of marriage is a common misperception. She emphasized that cohabitation can have a sliding effect rather than encouraging an actual commitment and decision. In this section, I also learned that dating or working down can be caused by previous experiences that we have not edited in order to be free. In order to be free, we have to understand that we are not the same person that experienced the trauma, but we are someone who is able to succeed despite them.

In the final section, The Brain and The Body, Jay teaches that when you reach your twenties you begin to establish finalized network connections in your brain that influence the remainder of your life. She also teaches that confidence comes from the outside in rather than the inside out. Twentysomethings are learning for their future through every aspect of their twenties including jobs, relationships, and plans. Jobs help acquire necessary technical and social skills, relationships help prepare them for partnerships, whether business or personal, and plans help guide and project for the future.

Overall, I think this book is a good starting point for anyone who feels lost in their twenties or is preparing to enter their twenties. Meg Jay covers work, love, and physical being with relatable stories from people also in their twenties.

Sincerely,

Multifaceted Black Girl